For a certain kind of writer, there's nothing scarier than one particular question. One question Luna likes to ask me whenever she wants to see me squirm. Well, no, there's a few questions like that she likes to ask me, but. From a writer's standpoint. I'm falling off topic.
Anyway, the question. The question is this: "Why do you write?" Because, really, there's nothing more deeply personal that you can ask of a writer than that. Now, generalizing here, but most writers will respond to this by looking up, smiling - usually awkwardly - and they'll respond: "Oh you know, because." Or something to that effect. As in, they provide a very thin cover, and then hurriedly change the subject, and any further attempts to poke into this path are usually met with fortified resistance.
Now, I'm not talking about people who write. I'm talking about writers: people who have devoted their lives to writing, who have spent countless hours honing their craft and skills. Anyone can become a writer but only a few desperate and sick individuals choose this lifestyle. Writing, real writing, after all, is being phased out in our society, which values art, moving pictures, and short, angry rants with bad spelling. And videos of people hurting themselves on content-sharing websites, and cute kittens. Luna won't let me watch cute animal videos, though, she gets mad at me.
But some unfortunates all the same, like myself, are driven to writing. Writing, that in 99% of cases will never get the appreciation it deserves from more than a few individuals, will be subjected to mockery and disdain, where it will be judged more by the pretty art on the cover and the number of words and pages it has than the actual quality of writing. And yet some people still choose to become... writers.
Put all that together, and maybe, suddenly, things will become pretty clear. When people ask me what I write for, I try to be honest. I say myself, and it's mostly true: sure, I like acknowledgments and compliments, but I'm going to write no matter what I feel about my writing, no matter what other people tell me. With my past in North Neigh, I was... told a lot of nasty things about my writing. Yet I kept doing it. And special talent or not, it would have been easier for me to stop. A world easier. Yet I never did... I know that I chose to keep doing it, because...
Why do I write? Because it can let you escape from the world in a way that nothing else can. Because it can get the poison out of your system in a way that nothing else can. Because it's just what I do. And because it lets me share all the things I'd normally try to hide in a way that I can be completely naked, and yet completely invisible all the same to a thousand staring eyes.
And Luna ruined the moment. I won't write what she said, but it had to do with being naked. And eyes. I'm. Going to end this here and wrap myself up in a blanket to hide from Luna.
~Scrivener Blooms
Friday, 26 October 2012
Friday, 19 October 2012
Better Learning Through Violence
Since Luna and I have been living out here, she's been insisting on "training" me. I say it like that because really all she does is take me out to the backyard and beat on me. I've relearned something, though, from my experiences with Luna's training and trials, that is very important to writing, and I believe everything else in life. That at the root of everything, discipline is key: discipline is not only what separates us from animals, but what can help us make the most of our skills and talents, and see through the worst of tasks.
It's weird to think about, but Luna and I do have... similarities. I mean, yes, on the surface we're complete opposites. Below the surface, too. I bet all our organs are different. But uh. Metaphorically-speaking, before Luna beats me, at our core we have a lot of the same beliefs, a lot of the same values, and I think that's part of the reason we're able to get along without killing each other, linked or not. And one of those is discipline: doing something every day, pushing yourself, taking risks and learning to endure, to never give up.
Every day, Luna finds the time between everything to exercise. Every day, I find the time to sit down for a little while, and write. Every day, Luna runs through combat strategy in her mind. Every day, I'm keeping plots, poetry, and ideas fluid and evolving in my mind. People say we're good at what we do, and they tell us we're talented... and Luna and I both are, sure. But what wins over talent, every time, is skill. Talent is something you're born with, but skill is what you cultivate, and develop yourself, through work and effort. You can be talented at something, and not skilled at it: likewise, you can become skilled at something you're not talented with. But the problem with the former is that if you don't put effort into your talent, into evolving it, into learning the whys and hows and practicing the basics even if you can do really crazy advanced stuff already... it'll stagnate. Just like if you don't practice a skill for so long, that will rust, too.
Training and working with Luna has reminded me of that. That if you really want to develop, to keep yourself running, you need discipline above everything else. It's discipline that lets you sit down and say "I'm going to work now" when all you want to do is relax, or throw off the job just this one time, or do anything else. It's discipline that lets you push through even when your mind starts to ache and your body hurts. It's discipline that lets you kick your brain into working even when it doesn't want to, and quell your emotions, focus through whatever else is going on, and keep moving forwards. And as I've found, both exercising and writing... they're good for getting the poison out, even when things really hurt. It's funny... I'll start on a really bad day, feeling like the last thing in the world I want to do is write, and yet once I push so far... all I want to do is keep myself moving. Everything becomes... clear, so to speak. There's a sense of clarity, and serenity. And I've experienced the same thing with my training with Luna, too... pushing to the point where my body aches and my muscles are on fire, but then, suddenly, everything feels... light, and the world makes sense, if only for a little while.
Of course, that could also just be the blood loss and oxygen deprivation too, huh?
Anyway. Discipline. Learning to endure sucks, but you'll be glad you did. It helps in every aspect of life. And you don't have to change anything about yourself, either... all you have to learn to do is say "I'm gonna do this" or "I'm not gonna do that," and then stick true to your word. It's not easy, but it is simple.
Now, I need to go make a pot of coffee for myself and Luna to avoid caffeine headaches. Hey, I'm allowed to be hypocritical and not totally disciplined. I'm a poet. We're all liars and hypocrites.
~Scrivener Blooms
It's weird to think about, but Luna and I do have... similarities. I mean, yes, on the surface we're complete opposites. Below the surface, too. I bet all our organs are different. But uh. Metaphorically-speaking, before Luna beats me, at our core we have a lot of the same beliefs, a lot of the same values, and I think that's part of the reason we're able to get along without killing each other, linked or not. And one of those is discipline: doing something every day, pushing yourself, taking risks and learning to endure, to never give up.
Every day, Luna finds the time between everything to exercise. Every day, I find the time to sit down for a little while, and write. Every day, Luna runs through combat strategy in her mind. Every day, I'm keeping plots, poetry, and ideas fluid and evolving in my mind. People say we're good at what we do, and they tell us we're talented... and Luna and I both are, sure. But what wins over talent, every time, is skill. Talent is something you're born with, but skill is what you cultivate, and develop yourself, through work and effort. You can be talented at something, and not skilled at it: likewise, you can become skilled at something you're not talented with. But the problem with the former is that if you don't put effort into your talent, into evolving it, into learning the whys and hows and practicing the basics even if you can do really crazy advanced stuff already... it'll stagnate. Just like if you don't practice a skill for so long, that will rust, too.
Training and working with Luna has reminded me of that. That if you really want to develop, to keep yourself running, you need discipline above everything else. It's discipline that lets you sit down and say "I'm going to work now" when all you want to do is relax, or throw off the job just this one time, or do anything else. It's discipline that lets you push through even when your mind starts to ache and your body hurts. It's discipline that lets you kick your brain into working even when it doesn't want to, and quell your emotions, focus through whatever else is going on, and keep moving forwards. And as I've found, both exercising and writing... they're good for getting the poison out, even when things really hurt. It's funny... I'll start on a really bad day, feeling like the last thing in the world I want to do is write, and yet once I push so far... all I want to do is keep myself moving. Everything becomes... clear, so to speak. There's a sense of clarity, and serenity. And I've experienced the same thing with my training with Luna, too... pushing to the point where my body aches and my muscles are on fire, but then, suddenly, everything feels... light, and the world makes sense, if only for a little while.
Of course, that could also just be the blood loss and oxygen deprivation too, huh?
Anyway. Discipline. Learning to endure sucks, but you'll be glad you did. It helps in every aspect of life. And you don't have to change anything about yourself, either... all you have to learn to do is say "I'm gonna do this" or "I'm not gonna do that," and then stick true to your word. It's not easy, but it is simple.
Now, I need to go make a pot of coffee for myself and Luna to avoid caffeine headaches. Hey, I'm allowed to be hypocritical and not totally disciplined. I'm a poet. We're all liars and hypocrites.
~Scrivener Blooms
Friday, 12 October 2012
How To Write, Part 8: What You Know
Writing is great. Writing based off stuff you know is even better, though.
This probably requires a bit of explanation and I should try and... yes. Okay, let's go back to the start and start at the... the start. Shut up, it's... it's really early in the morning, I'm not functioning yet and Luna's actually still in bed.
One common piece of advice from people - writers and not - is that you should write about what you know. This is true: if you know about something from researching into it or better yet, firsthoof experiences, you can usually write about it a lot more effectively, whether it's good memories or bad memories that are associated with it. That doesn't mean that every story should be your autobiography, though, or that you have to strictly write about those things in that exact form. This is where things like exaggeration, hyperbole, and other similar stuff come in very useful: learning to put a microscopic event like, say... a badly-cooked meal that makes everyone sick on to a macroscopic scale, turning it into... a plague that has infected the world, etcetera, is important. Yes, those two things are very different from each other and will clearly have different results, but there's plenty of things you can take from your nauseous experience with that bad, undercooked food and exaggerate, expand upon, and use as a base. You've all experienced what it's like to feel sick, right? Think of how it was for you, personally: the swimming in your stomach, the prick of tears in your eyes, the feel of sweat and the smells. These are all senses that were affected in the micro- event that you can use to begin building the structure of the macro- event.
You can do this with almost anything... and more importantly, this is where experiences that have helped shape you, that have been.. difficult, or unfortunate, can be used for good instead of left to fester and be bad. And to be honest... it's healing, too, for a writer to do this. To take that poison, and turn it into fuel for the creative process. To use negative experiences, and use them to express the emotions and feelings of a character. To help get across to someone who hasn't experienced these things first-hoof the impact and trauma of these events, whether they're personal stories or exaggerations to a macroscopic scale... but words carry emotions very well. When we write, we infuse a little piece of ourselves into our work, and most people can feel that in one way or another: the ability to transmit those emotions through writing is what separates the truly skilled and gifted from the rest.
Use your experiences, good and bad, as bases for your writing. Just remember to always validate the experiences of others, too, and that everyone experiences things differently. And remember most of all that your goal as a writer isn't just to make people happy: it's to make people feel. But I'll get more into that next week when I'm more awake. I gotta get coffee running before Luna wakes up.
~Scrivener Blooms
This probably requires a bit of explanation and I should try and... yes. Okay, let's go back to the start and start at the... the start. Shut up, it's... it's really early in the morning, I'm not functioning yet and Luna's actually still in bed.
One common piece of advice from people - writers and not - is that you should write about what you know. This is true: if you know about something from researching into it or better yet, firsthoof experiences, you can usually write about it a lot more effectively, whether it's good memories or bad memories that are associated with it. That doesn't mean that every story should be your autobiography, though, or that you have to strictly write about those things in that exact form. This is where things like exaggeration, hyperbole, and other similar stuff come in very useful: learning to put a microscopic event like, say... a badly-cooked meal that makes everyone sick on to a macroscopic scale, turning it into... a plague that has infected the world, etcetera, is important. Yes, those two things are very different from each other and will clearly have different results, but there's plenty of things you can take from your nauseous experience with that bad, undercooked food and exaggerate, expand upon, and use as a base. You've all experienced what it's like to feel sick, right? Think of how it was for you, personally: the swimming in your stomach, the prick of tears in your eyes, the feel of sweat and the smells. These are all senses that were affected in the micro- event that you can use to begin building the structure of the macro- event.
You can do this with almost anything... and more importantly, this is where experiences that have helped shape you, that have been.. difficult, or unfortunate, can be used for good instead of left to fester and be bad. And to be honest... it's healing, too, for a writer to do this. To take that poison, and turn it into fuel for the creative process. To use negative experiences, and use them to express the emotions and feelings of a character. To help get across to someone who hasn't experienced these things first-hoof the impact and trauma of these events, whether they're personal stories or exaggerations to a macroscopic scale... but words carry emotions very well. When we write, we infuse a little piece of ourselves into our work, and most people can feel that in one way or another: the ability to transmit those emotions through writing is what separates the truly skilled and gifted from the rest.
Use your experiences, good and bad, as bases for your writing. Just remember to always validate the experiences of others, too, and that everyone experiences things differently. And remember most of all that your goal as a writer isn't just to make people happy: it's to make people feel. But I'll get more into that next week when I'm more awake. I gotta get coffee running before Luna wakes up.
~Scrivener Blooms
Friday, 5 October 2012
How To Write, Part 7: Armor Thyself
No, it's not Luna. It's me. But I hear that in Luna's voice when I write it like that and... yes. It comes across with the right amount of emphasis I'm going for.
No matter who you are. Whether you're really super popular or some lowly no-name like me, someone out there is going to come across you, and not like your writing. Someone out there is going to take a swing at you: either because they want to "help," they've been having a bad day and you're an easy target, because for some reason you have vexed them and clearly it will ruin their entire lives if they don't say something immediately to make you suffer horribly for what you have dared to do, or just because they can. Although there are the most dangerous of all, too: the people who do really want to try and offer a little advice but who either lack tact or accidentally blunder right into a nerve.
If you want to survive as a writer, you have to be able to survive the criticism you're going to get. You don't have to learn to respond with politeness and dignity, of course, but that does help too. I, personally, try to only be a complete douchebag when it warrants it. Yes, the Royal Court always warranted it. ALWAYS.
Anyway, uh. Yes. First of all, you don't need high self esteem, or a loyal fanbase. You don't need to even really believe in the goodness and infallibility of your own writing: in some ways, it's better if you do recognize that yes, there. Are probably flaws in your work. But likewise, also recognize where your strengths are, and that the opinions of one don't matter: hell, even the opinions of the many don't matter in some scenarios. Look at how many stupid decisions people will make as a whole, especially when hot-button topics are involved or things that go against preconstructed norms or ideals. In the same hoof, don't use it as a crutch and shield when someone says "Dude, you spelled 'the' wrong about fifty times in this story. Please use spellcheck." But if a group of people from the Anti-Bad-Things society come up and tell you not to write bad things in your story because that's like, bad, then you can probably ignore them. Learn to recognize what can be treated in the realm of grey area, and what has to be treated as black and white.
You're going to have to learn to deal with people who like to nitpick. People who will tell you that everything you're doing is wrong. People whose greatest argument against you will be "your stupid," to which the proper response is and must always be: "my stupid what?" A lot of these are easy to shrug off, in theory, and it's easy to tell yourself, "it doesn't bother me at all." But sometimes things slip through, because of... associations, word choice, or just a plain lucky shot. And it's okay to feel that pain: writing is often a very personal thing, after all. What's not okay is taking it to heart, or letting them beat you. Whether it's one, ten, a hundred people, do not let anyone stop you from writing, or tell you how or what to write: keep going at it. Yes, there's always room for improvement, and yes, make sure that every now and then you look at your story and think over how things are going, and for the Horses of Heaven please try and maintain a consistent plot. But don't mutilate yourself for the pleasure of others. You might end up with adulation, sure... but inevitably, those people will always move on to the next new thing, and your stories, that you've written now purely for others, will lose all meaning to you. Might even become a source of shame. Write for yourself, first and foremost. Always write what you want to, the stories you're compelled to tell, and yes, do a good job of it, but don't let the harsh words of others ever steal the ability to write away from you. It's a skill, a talent, and a gift. Don't abuse it or forsake it just because "it's haaaard" or "they said mean things to me!"
Write, and don't let what other people say hurt you. Take their criticism, learn from your mistakes, build your experiences, but don't let people get under your skin and start telling you what's okay to write and what's not. These are your stories, not theirs, and if you touch even one person, if even one other person enjoys your stories... then you've succeeded in your task. You've succeeded even if you just complete a story, because it's not about fame or fortune or anything else. It's about writing. So. Write. Right? Right.
~Scrivener Blooms
No matter who you are. Whether you're really super popular or some lowly no-name like me, someone out there is going to come across you, and not like your writing. Someone out there is going to take a swing at you: either because they want to "help," they've been having a bad day and you're an easy target, because for some reason you have vexed them and clearly it will ruin their entire lives if they don't say something immediately to make you suffer horribly for what you have dared to do, or just because they can. Although there are the most dangerous of all, too: the people who do really want to try and offer a little advice but who either lack tact or accidentally blunder right into a nerve.
If you want to survive as a writer, you have to be able to survive the criticism you're going to get. You don't have to learn to respond with politeness and dignity, of course, but that does help too. I, personally, try to only be a complete douchebag when it warrants it. Yes, the Royal Court always warranted it. ALWAYS.
Anyway, uh. Yes. First of all, you don't need high self esteem, or a loyal fanbase. You don't need to even really believe in the goodness and infallibility of your own writing: in some ways, it's better if you do recognize that yes, there. Are probably flaws in your work. But likewise, also recognize where your strengths are, and that the opinions of one don't matter: hell, even the opinions of the many don't matter in some scenarios. Look at how many stupid decisions people will make as a whole, especially when hot-button topics are involved or things that go against preconstructed norms or ideals. In the same hoof, don't use it as a crutch and shield when someone says "Dude, you spelled 'the' wrong about fifty times in this story. Please use spellcheck." But if a group of people from the Anti-Bad-Things society come up and tell you not to write bad things in your story because that's like, bad, then you can probably ignore them. Learn to recognize what can be treated in the realm of grey area, and what has to be treated as black and white.
You're going to have to learn to deal with people who like to nitpick. People who will tell you that everything you're doing is wrong. People whose greatest argument against you will be "your stupid," to which the proper response is and must always be: "my stupid what?" A lot of these are easy to shrug off, in theory, and it's easy to tell yourself, "it doesn't bother me at all." But sometimes things slip through, because of... associations, word choice, or just a plain lucky shot. And it's okay to feel that pain: writing is often a very personal thing, after all. What's not okay is taking it to heart, or letting them beat you. Whether it's one, ten, a hundred people, do not let anyone stop you from writing, or tell you how or what to write: keep going at it. Yes, there's always room for improvement, and yes, make sure that every now and then you look at your story and think over how things are going, and for the Horses of Heaven please try and maintain a consistent plot. But don't mutilate yourself for the pleasure of others. You might end up with adulation, sure... but inevitably, those people will always move on to the next new thing, and your stories, that you've written now purely for others, will lose all meaning to you. Might even become a source of shame. Write for yourself, first and foremost. Always write what you want to, the stories you're compelled to tell, and yes, do a good job of it, but don't let the harsh words of others ever steal the ability to write away from you. It's a skill, a talent, and a gift. Don't abuse it or forsake it just because "it's haaaard" or "they said mean things to me!"
Write, and don't let what other people say hurt you. Take their criticism, learn from your mistakes, build your experiences, but don't let people get under your skin and start telling you what's okay to write and what's not. These are your stories, not theirs, and if you touch even one person, if even one other person enjoys your stories... then you've succeeded in your task. You've succeeded even if you just complete a story, because it's not about fame or fortune or anything else. It's about writing. So. Write. Right? Right.
~Scrivener Blooms
Thursday, 4 October 2012
Writing Interruptus
Okay. So I left my stupid thing unguarded and Luna got into it. Please ignore her. I still have a few notes I'd like to make on my How To Write series, but... I'll write that post tomorrow or the next day or something. For now, I think I'll write about...
Uh.
Luna demands a poem about her. Fine.
Once upon a time I thought I would marry someone nice,
But that was long before you and I broke the ice.
Once upon a time I thought I would marry someone gentle,
But instead I chose someone who likes to hit me with metal.
I used to think I'd marry someone who I could hold in my embrace,
Instead I have someone who likes to put me in my place.
I used to think I'd marry someone who was kind and soft and sensitive,
Instead I have someone who pummels demons into the results of laxative.
I used to dream that I would marry some total hottie,
I ended up with a mare with a very muscular body.
I used to dream that I would marry rich and live in luxury,
I ended up as an exile in a forest living in infamy.
I married the mare not of my dreams, but of my worst nightmares,
She fills me with terror, madness and all kinds of horrible fears.
I married the mare not of my fantasies, but of my trepidation,
She fills me with the deepest levels of incredible frustration.
And yet I wouldn't change it for the world, for any miracle or dream,
Because together me and her have long become a perfect team.
I love her all the more because of the way we jaggedly fit together,
And I plan to fear and loathe and love her for all and ever.
There's your poem Luna. I hope it makes you happy.
Now she wants me to write... no. I am not writing that. And no, if I won't write it I certainly won't do it. I. Oh great. I have to go now before Luna pokes a hole in me with her horn. Resuming normalcy... sometime. Probably never. ProDAMMIT NOT IN MY EAR.
~Scrivener Blooms
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